Comments on: Advice to a Christian http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html NIGHTTIME IS FOR DREAMING. DAYLIGHT IS FOR ACTION. Sun, 20 Jul 2008 22:37:55 +0000 By: Virginia http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-37146 Virginia Tue, 15 Jul 2008 08:43:27 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-37146 Most Christians I know, have placed God higher than most because this is something they committed at a very very young age, and accumulation of supposedly "religious/spiritual" experiences simply hardened the conviction. To get Contraskeptic to heed your advice is to force him to undermine all those experiences he had -- and that is very very shakening to the core of his person -- human fears this kind of self-doubt, perhaps often enough to put their loved ones at a secondary position. Most Christians I know, have placed God higher than most because this is something they committed at a very very young age, and accumulation of supposedly "religious/spiritual" experiences simply hardened the conviction. To get Contraskeptic to heed your advice is to force him to undermine all those experiences he had -- and that is very very shakening to the core of his person -- human fears this kind of self-doubt, perhaps often enough to put their loved ones at a secondary position.

]]> By: Ebonmuse http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35889 Ebonmuse Thu, 22 May 2008 11:45:38 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35889 Thanks for the update, TJ. That's good news, I think - I sincerely hope it will resolve the issues that had come between them. Thanks for the update, TJ. That's good news, I think - I sincerely hope it will resolve the issues that had come between them.

]]> By: TJ http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35844 TJ Wed, 21 May 2008 14:00:39 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35844 Huh. He <a href="http://contraskeptic.blogspot.com/2008/02/end-of-story.html" rel="nofollow">got the vasectomy</a> earlier this year. I guess common sense and the realization that he was destroying his family finally won out. Huh. He got the vasectomy earlier this year. I guess common sense and the realization that he was destroying his family finally won out.

]]> By: Polly http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35125 Polly Wed, 30 Apr 2008 18:02:24 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35125 Well, if you want opinions from random strangers, then I fill the bill nicely. You are NOT being selfish! Repeat after me, "Hands off my scrotum!" If she's pressuring you to make major, life-long decisions after 11 months tell her to go to Hell (fun little township in Michigan). Anyone who has the gall to spout ultimata about something like this is a control freak and you should get away from her as quickly as possible. Don't progress, don't pass "Go", and don't collect $200. Just run. 30 is young and still a little too early to decide that you definitely never want to have children of your own, EVER. (I, myself, have no children after almost a decade of marriage. I don't really care for rug-rats, but I will probably give in (to my wife's wish) and have one in the near future, biology allowing.) Well, if you want opinions from random strangers, then I fill the bill nicely.

You are NOT being selfish! Repeat after me, "Hands off my scrotum!"

If she's pressuring you to make major, life-long decisions after 11 months tell her to go to Hell (fun little township in Michigan). Anyone who has the gall to spout ultimata about something like this is a control freak and you should get away from her as quickly as possible. Don't progress, don't pass "Go", and don't collect $200. Just run.
30 is young and still a little too early to decide that you definitely never want to have children of your own, EVER.

(I, myself, have no children after almost a decade of marriage. I don't really care for rug-rats, but I will probably give in (to my wife's wish) and have one in the near future, biology allowing.)

]]> By: Ebonmuse http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35094 Ebonmuse Wed, 30 Apr 2008 04:47:09 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35094 Well, you asked for opinions, so here's mine: I don't think it's inherently unreasonable for one partner in a relationship to ask the other to be sterilized, if both are agreed that they don't want any more children. However, I do think that 11 months is extremely early to ask such a thing, especially given that you're only 30. Who knows if you're going to be with this woman for the rest of your life? If you end up with someone else, or if you two stay together and later decide you want children, this may not be reversible. I wouldn't even consider it until a much more advanced stage of the relationship. Well, you asked for opinions, so here's mine: I don't think it's inherently unreasonable for one partner in a relationship to ask the other to be sterilized, if both are agreed that they don't want any more children. However, I do think that 11 months is extremely early to ask such a thing, especially given that you're only 30. Who knows if you're going to be with this woman for the rest of your life? If you end up with someone else, or if you two stay together and later decide you want children, this may not be reversible. I wouldn't even consider it until a much more advanced stage of the relationship.

]]> By: CuriousToSeeOpinions http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35091 CuriousToSeeOpinions Wed, 30 Apr 2008 03:39:07 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35091 lastly...am I being selfish? lastly...am I being selfish?

]]> By: CuriousToSeeOpinions http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35090 CuriousToSeeOpinions Wed, 30 Apr 2008 03:38:28 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-35090 I have light religious beliefs, none of which determine my position on this matter. I find myself in a similar situation with my current girlfriend. She has two children who are of ages 12 and 14 both C-sections. We've been dating for 11 months. She has no intention on having any more children. I am 30 years old with no children of my own. We are progressing in our relationship nicely. She is taking birth control currently but her desire is to go off the BC. She has recently given me an ultimatum. I must have a vasectomy. I honestly have no intention ever to get this done. I guess through my upbringing (family around me who haven't had this procedure) this has never been something that makes sense. My belief is that if I was meant to have children in this lifetime I would, if I wasn't meant to I wouldn't. I really think it's a psychological reason why I won't have a vasectomy. If I was to have the procedure then there would be a 25% chance that I couldn't have it reversed. Is this something that I should have to think about this early in a relationship? I understand her end of things. It's the easiest solution. If the male pill was out yet I would take it in a heartbeat. I have light religious beliefs, none of which determine my position on this matter. I find myself in a similar situation with my current girlfriend. She has two children who are of ages 12 and 14 both C-sections. We've been dating for 11 months. She has no intention on having any more children. I am 30 years old with no children of my own. We are progressing in our relationship nicely. She is taking birth control currently but her desire is to go off the BC. She has recently given me an ultimatum. I must have a vasectomy. I honestly have no intention ever to get this done. I guess through my upbringing (family around me who haven't had this procedure) this has never been something that makes sense. My belief is that if I was meant to have children in this lifetime I would, if I wasn't meant to I wouldn't. I really think it's a psychological reason why I won't have a vasectomy. If I was to have the procedure then there would be a 25% chance that I couldn't have it reversed. Is this something that I should have to think about this early in a relationship? I understand her end of things. It's the easiest solution. If the male pill was out yet I would take it in a heartbeat.

]]> By: M. Robert Bond http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-32514 M. Robert Bond Mon, 03 Mar 2008 07:40:39 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-32514 I don't know the exact verses that are used to uphold contraception bans, but I do know a few that that can easily be interpreted to say to "put God first and let the chips fall where they may" - Abraham and Isaac comes to mind, as does a certain red-lettered rant in the NT containing lines like "I come not to bring peace, but to bring a sword" and "he who will not forsake his family is not worthy of me" and "I have come to divide father against son and mother against daughter". I don't know the exact verses that are used to uphold contraception bans, but I do know a few that that can easily be interpreted to say to "put God first and let the chips fall where they may" - Abraham and Isaac comes to mind, as does a certain red-lettered rant in the NT containing lines like "I come not to bring peace, but to bring a sword" and "he who will not forsake his family is not worthy of me" and "I have come to divide father against son and mother against daughter".

]]> By: Brit-nontheist http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-32237 Brit-nontheist Tue, 26 Feb 2008 16:38:42 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-32237 Ben: <blockquote> How is trying to time your wife's cycle any different from using a condom or getting a vasectomy? </blockquote> It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by resorting to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics or chemistry. <i>H. L. Mencken</i> Ben:

How is trying to time your wife's cycle any different from using a condom or getting a vasectomy?

It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by resorting to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics or chemistry.
H. L. Mencken

]]> By: Jenyfer http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-31429 Jenyfer Thu, 07 Feb 2008 23:46:27 +0000 http://www.daylightatheism.org/2007/02/advice-to-a-christian.html#comment-31429 I think you handled this quite well: appealing to his humanity and to other non-religious concerns without trying to convince him to be an atheist (not that this would be a bad thing, but it's probably counterproductive to try and convince him within the scope of this particular argument). I think you handled this quite well: appealing to his humanity and to other non-religious concerns without trying to convince him to be an atheist (not that this would be a bad thing, but it's probably counterproductive to try and convince him within the scope of this particular argument).

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