Originally posted on Atlas Shrugged: Missing and Presumed.
Cobra Commander: Well I'm back from looting the bank.
John Galt: Why do you feel the need to say that?
Cobra Commander: Oh general gloating I suppose. Half the fun of stealing from you people is reminding you of it. By the way, what is that ghastly sound coming from upstairs?
John Galt: Oh you might want to go see for yourself...
Cobra Commander: You! And... Destro!?
Destro: I haven't been able to get this fool to leave me alone. But when we were tracking down the remote distress beacon you activated...
John Galt: Hey, no communication allowed!
Cobra Commander: *shoots John Galt in the leg*
Cobra Commander: You purchase goods from the outside world, you bring people in from the outside world, and you go out to visit people in the outside world to tell them about this place. And you have your little stooges run around on top of that giving vague and not quite cryptic hints about this valley of yours to whomever they like. Forgive me if I don't really buy into this 'no communication' policy of yours. Sorry about that noble Destro, do continue, he'll quiet up soon.
Destro: He's certainly crying less than this sad buffoon. Apparently can't get over the fact that this woman is still alive.
Francisco: DAGNY!
Cobra Commander: Idiot! Why didn't you just tell her about this place when I told you to?
Dagny Taggart: What are you talking about?
Cobra Commander: This love struck moron has been keeping this place a secret from you for ages, I told him to just fess up about it but he apparently would rather spend his time paling around with Destro here.
Destro: Don't think I've forgotten what you've done to me Commander. Don't think this poltroon let me forget your kind 'gift' for a minute.
Cobra Commander: Oh you'll quit your complaining when you see what I've looted from this sad excuse for a valley.
Francisco: *sniffling* I couldn't tell Dagny, don't you see!?
Dagny Taggart: Yes it makes perfect sense to me. So much sense, in fact, that I don't think it's necessary for us to really have a talk about why an old friend and lover of mine would keep this place a secret from me.
Cobra Commander: Seriously? You're just going to let him off the hook like this?
Dagny Taggart: Well he is crying an awful lot...
Francisco: I am! See, I have emotions! I am experiencing emotions right now! The most over the top emotion possible! See! I'm identifiable! The woman I love is alive and I'm so happy!
Cobra Commander: Why because you can be with her now?
Francisco: Oh heavens no.
Cobra Commander: What, you just stopped crying!
Francisco: Yes well emotions all done with, I've got some wonderful technology I'd really like for Dagny to get a look at when she gets the chance.
Cobra Commander: *shoots Francisco in the leg*
Cobra Commander: There, are we even Destro?
Destro: Well he is crying again but it doesn't feel as aggravating this time.
Dagny Taggart: Why would you shoot a sweet, innocent man like that?
Cobra Commander: For years. Years. This man kept you in the dark about this place despite you well knowing one another. They invited countless people to come here and he freely admits that he considered you would be perfectly fit in here and yet he never once invited you to this one place where you feel truly happy, and you don't resent him even in the slightest for that?
Dagny Taggart: Obviously not, since his reasons make so much sense to me.
Destro: What reason could she possibly be talking about? He didn't give any reasons at all!
Cobra Commander: Come along Destro, I have a lot to explain to you about how this place works... and I've got a little tractor I think you might like to see.