Originally posted on Atlas Shrugged: Damn the Humanitarians.
Wesley Mouch: Ah so good of you to come along! And I see you've brought Ms. Taggart with you!
Cobra Commander: Yes yes, as per the request attached to your very generous retainer, which I assume will be enough to make up for the headaches to come.
Dagny Taggart: What do you people want with me!?
Wesley Mouch: Oh the same thing that I want from Mr. Commander here! I was really hoping the both of you would approve of what I'm doing. I've been putting in so much work coming up with a good villain plan and... and I just really think it'll impress the both of you.
Cobra Commander: Well I've been spending so much time around these so called 'heroes' I suppose having a chance to watch you abjectly fail at your job again will be a nice touch.
Dagny Taggart: And I will never approve of anything you do!
Wesley Mouch: Well I'm just going to pretend both of you said nice things about me and get to explaining. You see the first stage of our plan has been going off without a hitch. We've been failing at everything we're doing and the world is falling apart all around us. Industries are failing, people are starving, and mass revolt is being fostered all across the country.
Cobra Commander: Well you certainly have at least succeeded in what you set out to do. I would say I can't fault you for that but since I can I will just fault you for that.
Dagny Taggart: We could still save the country by completely abandoning half of it. This is a plan that is completely sensible. I mean it's not like all the people we publicly discard will attempt to revolt and bring revolution against us. How could they, we'll take the trains away from them!
Wesley Mouch: Alright and since I haven't actually listened to either one of you I'll just keep going on. So now we'll allow the country to rot away while we use force of arms to maintain a bare minimum peace until that is no longer feasible and then... well hopefully by then we'll all be dead because we're too stupid to have really thought of what will happen next.
Dagny Taggart: You fools! You stupid, fat, smelly, unwashed fools! Just like Indians!
Cobra Commander: WOAH.
Wesley Mouch: Yeah that is not alright Ms. Taggart.
Cobra Commander: Cobra is an equal opportunity employer, as evil always is, but I'm surprised to hear you stand up for that Mr. Mouch.
Wesley Mouch: Oh I'm not actually against racism. Like all people I lack empathy. But pretending to have it allows me to ensure greater suffering in the long run.
Dagny Taggart: If you let this country be destroyed, just like a lazy, slothful, evil, glassy eyed Indian would, then we'll never, ever be able to rebuild this country! Ever!
Cobra Commander: I... I am really not sure where all this racism is coming from ah... have... have you ever actually met an Indian person?
Dagny Taggart: Of course not, I live in America.
Wesley Mouch: Yes you well know everyone in America is Caucasian don't you?
Cobra Commander: Wait I... I... Holy crap everyone I've been dealing with has been white haven't they? That is insane. It's literally almost improbable. And when dealing so much with the railroads so just... I mean the United States railroads were built on the backs of minorities.
Dagny Taggart: Well actually... wait. You're not one of those deceitful Indian types are you?
Cobra Commander: Oh no actually I'm sort of a snake monster person from an ancient civilization that I was... you know what, it's a long story. I got sidetracked by the reminder of how absolutely horrible you were, will be a good excuse to up your torture when we get back. Not that I need the excuse of course!
Wesley Mouch: Well I always approve of having excuses, you know...
Cobra Commander: Shut up, not getting side tracked again. Dagny... your friends' entire plan revolves around their ability to rebuild the country after it is destroyed.
Dagny Taggart: Of course. That much has been made evidently clear to me and considering how amazingly perfect they are at everything they do, the fact that they made a little Utopia town is obviously proof they could rebuild the entire world as, obviously, the exact same skills and the exact same number of people needed to make a small community work of course translates equally to the large scale of rebuilding the entire world.
Cobra Commander: But you've just also said that is impossible.
Dagny Taggart: Oh indeed. If you lose the industrial base it could never be ever rebuilt. Ever. Also you know there will be roving gangs of bandits and marauders probably, I mean that's already happening and I myself am accusing my opponents of being robber baron kings so I of course believe that after society collapses that those with power, whatever that may be, will rob and steal and loot and murder... just like those murderous Indians.
Wesley Mouch: Sorry but I did call you both here to...
Cobra Commander: Mouch, at the moment I'm saving most of my hate for Dagny here, if you're truly a humanitarian and would like to share some of it do feel free to interrupt me again. So Dagny, as I was saying. By your own admission, the moment Galt and his doughy industrialist friends wander into the post apocalyptic wasteland of the United States they'll just be skinned and eaten by ravagers, won't they?
Dagny Taggart: Obviously not. Because they're just that amazingly spectacularly good.
Wesley Mouch: Yes she's got you on that one.
Cobra Commander: Okay you've earned yourself a trip to the dungeons as well.
Wesley Mouch: Why thank you! I wasn't actually listening to what you had to say but I'm going to pretend it was praise, since that's what I invited you here for! To pretend you were praising me!
Dagny Taggart: Gasp! Only now do I understand how evil you truly are, by not actually caring what I have to say and having a disagreeing opinion with me!
Cobra Commander: Oh I was wrong about the retainer... so very very wrong.